A great 19th-century American writer, Mark Twain once said, "The worst kind of death is to be spoken of with death." Twain's message illustrated how embarrassing it would be for a long-term, familiar man to embark on a terrible conversation.
Last weekend I found myself in such a situation when I went to visit my friend Tom tom morning morning volleyball. When I moved to Tom, Tom's neighbor, Ed. Ed's experience is that she likes to tell long stories. Therefore, I must be careful when joining the conversations when there are time constraints (such as getting to the beach to meet my friends). For the first time, I would point out that Ed is a very nice person and a friendly conversation is part of the socialization as usual. Unfortunately, you do not seem to recognize when the other person is short on time or just does not know how to briefly describe his story. Edward is very common for me to make a general comment, such as "This is a great day for volleyball" and this will lead to a 10-minute monologue. Ed often responds to such a comment: "Yes, this is a great day for volleyball and reminds me of going back to Kansas when I played ball and … blah, blah, blah."
I'm sure I'll see Ed like a bit rough, but I almost forced him to skip or impatiently listen when I do not have time. Ed does not realize that he tends to tell long, uninterrupted stories to avoid conversations with him. Even when we have time to talk, I have to prepare for an unbalanced conversation where I'm likely to listen to 80% of my time and only 20% talk. [Ed.] Ed does not necessarily know or do not know how to be short. In order to help people who do not know how to be short, there are indicators that balance the air time so that other people have equal chances:
• Do not talk more than 15 minutes to let the other person to say a few words. This gives the other a chance to say something before he talks too much about himself.
• If you feel you have to share a story, make sure it says in advance: "Here's a quick story". Or you can try to get permission: "Can I tell you a quick story?"
• Quickly build your quick stories by limiting yourself to up to two minutes.
• Explain only the action section story. Avoid spending a lot of time on the scene or background of the story. If the story is interesting to the other person and you have time to listen, you will have to complete the details later when you ask.
• Do not leave the box – skip ahead
• As a joke, do not leave your story too long and you risk a lot of detail or risk losing public attention.
• Ask "Are you with me?" Somewhere in the middle of your story if you feel you are losing the audience's attention. This also means that effective communication requires observing the non-verbal response of the audience.
• If you start pulling or listening to the body language without paying much attention, you can quickly summarize your observations by saying, "So a long story is short …" or "So the essence of my story is …" or " So differently …. "
To be an effective communicator of both your personal and professional relationships, you need to learn how to be short. The reality of communication is that it closes the attention of most people … and sometimes it is very short too!
LIGHTWEIGHT </ strong>
Do not take long monologues. Learn to tell what to say quickly, understand and let the other have a chance to talk. This habit allows you to enjoy a more receptive audience the next time you meet the same people.
Source by sbobet